Creating my future, one miracle at a time

Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well. —Robert Louis Stevenson

None of us suddenly becomes something overnight  The preparations have been in the making for a lifetime.  —Gail Godwin.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance .

AACK.  --Just a few of the current tornadoes in my life right now:
IRS
FAFSA   -- Is there anyone else out there in college or sending someone to college who can identify?
ASA      --  Autism Society of America
ASA      --  Autism Society of Alabama  (the Birmingham chapter of the ASA -- what were they thinking? I never know who I mean)
NAASA -- chapter 101, the North AL chapter,  the one I'm the secretary of.
    5th annual Teacher Appreciation Dinner.
       make and send out invitations, both email, and nice cards
       keep track of reservations
       get donations for door prizes
       contact local providers and arrange for information booths at dinner
       send nice thank you letters to donors of door prizes
    Easter Egg Hunt (leftovers)  deliver photos of kids with Bunny, ask permission to use on site.
    Sell tickets for Belk's Charity Sale  (the chapter gets to keep all $5 of the price of the ticket, and the buyer gets $5 off their first purchase the             day of the sale.  And any charity can sign up to sell tickets.  Belk is doing good works in the community)
    Make Yahoo group for local chapter
    Find someone to make a website.
    oh yeah, attend meetings, do minutes
Autism Speaks  (but not for most Autistics)  Just make me crazy.  Bite tongue, do not rant about "curebies"
IDEA         (Individuals with Disabilities Education Improvement Act)  -  learning to advocate for others
IEP      Individual Education Plan -- what special Ed students allegedly get in Public School  (per IDEA)
FAPE  Free Appropriate Public Education  yeah, right, see above.
ASYPSG     Thomas's ASperger's social group
Asperger's Luncheon - monthly support group I'm in charge of, and need to send reminders for.
UAB - MAT 
UAH - THOMAS
ADA         (not the dentists - the Americans with Disabilities Act)
RED CROSS
BLOOD TIES
MOONLIGHT
PAYPAL  (ANOTHER AACCKK!!)
Franklin School
    teach lit group this month, teacher's aide often
    member of Parent Executive Board
    Diploma Reviews coming up - 9 kids this year, plus presentation by Thomas (senior project)
    Graduation 2008 - Thomas and four girls, May 17
       make poster on Snapfish
       pay Julie for M&Ms
       meeting Monday at venue
       what am I bringing for snack?
       Borrow Christine's commercial coffepot
    Yearbook - send pics of Thomas at events to editor (find?)
    Thomas's Senior pictures - decide on which, and order in time to get in yearbook

One of my younger friends, maliciastarling, has recently said some things to me (in a comment on my recent cell phone rant) that has really made me think about the young people coming up and what's been done to them, and how they've reacted. 

They really have grown up with Big Brother looking over their shoulder.  Like my age group growing up "knowing" that "they" would probably launch the nukes and blow us all up before we could stop them.  (strange how quickly we went from not trusting the establishment to BEING the establishment)

So, just like a lot of my cohort tended to be very fatalistic, and try everything today, we may not have tomorrow, this group has just abandoned the whole concept of privacy it seems. 

I would have thought i would make them secretive and private, jealously guarding what they can. (It sort of has me) But here we all are, posting our thoughts on the world wide web.  And having intimate conversations as if everyone else in the checkout line can't hear us.   I don't understand the young woman who this morning explained her surgery in detail to someone on the phone, and tho I tried not to listen, me.  And it was not like she thought she was alone.  I was sitting in a lobby when she came in, sat next to me, and made the phone call!

On the other hand, there is such a thing as "hidden in plain sight."  The best place to hide a book is in a library.  Maybe the very flood of information so assaults us that we don't really know anything about anybody.  It's too hard to pick the real and important stuff out of all the STUFF.  Might as well tell everyone everything, so that if we accidentally let something real or important or private slip, maybe no one will notice.

Actually, the cell phone thing is two issues, one is the lack of privacy.  The other is the whole, can't be still, can't be alone, can't waste a moment, must be multi-tasking business.

  maliciastarlingwrote:
"In fact I think you're closer to the truth on the whole "they're afraid to be alone with their thoughts". We literally are a generation that's being taught that the idle moment alone is a moment wasted. We must always be multi-tasking."

I'm truly, truly sorry that this the message that they took  from us.  We meant to say, "Life is precious, and ephemeral, and must be lived every minute, and enjoy the little stuff, because the big stuff is few and far between and fill every second with the things that feed your soul, and bring you light, and show you who you are, and who you can be..."

Yes, we did say, fill every second.  But we meant for you to fill it with things worth your time.  And  YOU CHOOSE what you fill you time with.  you don't have to be at the disposal of every fool who can dial, just because they can.

And really, if it can't wait until I get out of the bathroom, then the firetrucks better already be in the front yard.

Work as if you don't need the money.
Dance as if no one can see you.
Love as if you've never been hurt.

AAADD
I have now finally figured out what I have!!    
- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ! -
Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder. Somehow I feel better, even though I have it!!

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.  As I turn on the hose in the driveway,  I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

The Coke is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need water.

I put the Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:

the car isn't washed

the bills aren't paid

there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter

the flowers don't have enough water,

there is still only 1 check in my check book,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail....

Do me a favor.
Forward this message to everyone you know,
because I don't remember who  I've sent it to.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!

__._,_.___

Well, poor lumpy was miserable, and it was time, and I've been trying from the beginning to not get attached to her, because she was sick when she came to me as a rescue, but over the last three years, I'd succumbed. She had character. And it was hard to take her to the vet for that final time. But it really was time. She has lost complete control and even apparently sensation beyond what would have been a human's waist.

So after, Thomas took me to Ruby Tuesday's and I had a couple of cocktails. I never was a crying drunk, Thank God. I feel a little melancholy, but also, right. And just a tad relieved. It's been hard watching her in pain these last few days.

I'm so over-scheduled I don't even know what I'm up to these days.  I remember lots of driving at Thanksgiving, a concert, a couple of field trips, lots of rehearsals of medieval music, lots of astronomy lectures, some sword play, leather mugs, japanese lessons.  I'm beginning to think my whole life is about driving Thomas around.

Speaking of the ASTA Honors Strings Festival and Concert, check out the pictures:

My Boy at ASTA

Man it's been a really busy last few days. I've been falling into bed exhausted without even trying to get on the internet. It doesn't help. The more I sleep, the worse i feel. Today I have a migraine. Of course I do, it's day two (well, really day one and a half) of the cycle. I feel incredibly overwhelmed. still. I can't seem to catch up no matter what I do.